I was on a great radio show yesterday (down load it now)
A woman called in and wanted to know how, as an administrator, she could help other people who were having problems with the General Manager. Currently she was sending them to Human Resources and nothing was being resolved.
Dave Rawles, the host of the show, had a wonderful comment. Human Resources is not the ringmaster. Each employee must take personal responsibility for handling their issues (except of course if the bosses behavior is illegal and crosses EEOC boundaries.)
I advised her to suggest different resources to help them grow their skill, which in turn will help their confidence in broaching the person directly. I am totally convinced that people want others to “fix” their problems and that most people are too lazy to change their own habits. Don’t get pulled into this difficult person behavior and they don’t even know they are being a toxic person!
Does this sound cruel and abusive? It shouldn’t because we must all take personal responsibility for our outcomes and choices and leave others to their own devices. You cannot “help” anyone and in my opinion, you can only give them considerations.
1. Give them a book, website or article to read to improve their communication skill. You can help them keep track on the road to personal development.
2. Recommend they learn negotiation skills. Here is a good web site with information that will help negotiating.
3. Suggest they find a mentor to help them make different choices and to pass their approaches by another party.
Here is another link and you can download more information on career searches, resume writing and success. This is a podcast I did with Rick.