The Choice of Civility, Difficult People and Perspective

What a wide variety of comments were posted on the Leadership or Toxic Behavior post! Thanks to everyone who took the time to share their perspective. My goal is to help people and myself see leadership and conflict resolution through different examples and the ‘tarmac’ was just that – an example. I totally agree with what President Obama said in January 2011 after the horrible event in Tucson, “to expand our moral imaginations, to listen to each other more carefully” and to “remind ourselves of all the ways that our hopes and dreams are bound together.”

No matter what the situation, everyone should choose civility especially when dealing with someone displaying difficult behavior or as my dad would say, “Wants to pick a fight.” Nothing is solved when fingers are pointed and words shared that rile others. Bias is in the eye of the beholder in my opinion.

I understand that it takes the brain three seconds or less to establish perspective and to judge. So for me, personally trying harder to choose words carefully because what one person sees as political another may not. What someone perceives to be an evil comment, another may not. This is why the comments of the post were so varied. Background, focus, culture, age, disposition, attitude, and more play into our thought process. It becomes the good, bad, right and wrong.  No gray area.

So I choose to use examples that make people think. Staying open, flexible and suspending judgment in any situation is always a goal for me. That is why I watch a variety of news sources — local and cable providing a wide range of perspectives so my own opinions are created. It is all about civility and I try hard to keep an open mind and will try even harder. Civility will be my focus and part of my personal leadership.

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  1. Jodi Bakken says:

    Thanks for the thought-provoking post! I share many of the same philosophies as you on this subject. I would love to send over a couple of posts that focus on conflict resolution and get your feedback.

    1. Marsha says:

      Sounds good to me. I look forward to looking at them.

  2. Jodi Bakken says:

    Great, Marsha!
    I’ll send them over soon!

  3. Jodi Bakken says:

    Hi Marsha-
    Sending these your way via email! Thanks

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